Exert yourself. Force yourself to pay attention to what is going on. Do not drift off or tune out people, or daydream. Become an active participant in the world around you.
~This was in my email inbox today, from a website that gives advice to a person's specific personality foibles. It's ironic that I received this particular advice on this day, because this pretty much sums up what I told my daughter as she was leaving our house to catch the bus. About 45 minutes later I received a phone call from her telling me she had forgot her homework at home again.
I have to remind myself that she is going to have some growing pains just like everybody else. Because she seems to share many of the same 'pains' as I have experienced, it triggers especially powerful feelings of frustration and guilt.
I know what it is like to navigate through grade school, junior high, high school, college, relationships, jobs, and pretty much anything else that requires a certain amount of personal engagement. I know that sudden feeling of free falling through space only painfully connect with whatever it is I wasn't paying attention to. It has been a life long journey for me, this learning how to stay inside of myself instead of floating along in dreamland far far away from planet Earth.
I don't want my little girl to experience those particular hard thumps of life. I want to help her. It's hard finding the balance of how to reach her. If I speak too soft, it doesn't penetrate the happy place where she lives. If I speak too hard, I become one of the very thumps that I don't want her to experience. I just can't seem to find the happy medium we both need.
4 comments:
I know exactly how you feel. Shane is the same way. But all we can do is guide, encourage, support, discipline and love them. I constantly remind myself he's a child and he doesn't get it. Eventually it has to click. Prayer and patience is required. And we have to realize that we can't save them from every thump of life. They won't be able to navigate life if we shield them. You can relate to her cuz you see yourself. That will help her to rely on and trust you for the guidance she will need to get through it. Its not easy. It hurts me to see Shane struggle through it. But one day soon "lala land" will be on the back burner... and i hope, one day, they will thank us for trusting and believing that they can and will survive.
It's comforting to know I'm not the only parent who struggles and worries about this with their child. Prayer and patience- yes, so much needed!!! And you are right- they really won't learn to navigate life if we shield them- those are some of the most powerful lessons.
Thank you Nik!!
And you know what's amazing with dreamers... they turn into the most beautiful, artistic, loyal and cherished people I know!
<3 <3 <3 you girl. Ya make me smile:)
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