"We were together. I forget the rest". Walt Whitman
This last weekend Derrick and I went out of town for our anniversary, as we try to do every year. The last four years we have went to Whitefish for our anniversary, so this year we decided to shake it up and go to Spokane instead.
The one commonality of our anniversaries throughout the years have been the monochromatic way the December sky decides to present itself. As we headed out of town on Friday, it looked as though we were heading into the usual grey but happy weekend, but somewhere around the middle of Saturday, the clouds opened up and gave us blue skies. They stuck around for the rest of our time out of town, and even now it is blue skies and sunny.
This was one of my personal favorite anniversary trips. Our motel was really close to downtown Spokane, so we pretty much walked to most of the places we wanted to go throughout the weekend. There was the usual shopping that goes along with a trip to Spokane, but we spent a lot of time walking, hanging out in our room (which was very nice), and going to some of the fun restaurants and pubs in downtown Spokane.
I love anniversary weekends. We always make the effort to have that weekend to ourselves, and without fail we have the best discussions together of our year.
We talked about getting older, and our fears we have attached to it. My fear (as I'm sure it is for a lot of people), is that of being devalued as a person by society. Derrick's is mostly just the fear of being sickly or not being able to do what he once did. Other than that, he's looking forward to being a cranky old man with no pressure from society to follow rules. He's preparing for a reign of obnoxiousness :) Getting old wouldn't be so bad as long as I could do it with him, because I know he will always see me as I really am. Hopefully, though, we will never have to get old.
Of course (!) we talked about the kids. Like most parents, we talk about them a lot. You know how when you love someone, all conversations have a way of leading to that person? That principle must apply to parents with their children. Our hopes and dreams for them equal and surpass the hopes and dreams for ourselves. The sum of our kid conversations are mostly how to keep them safe and sound but also give the tools and freedom to create happiness and dreams for themselves. As they get older, we are seeing what a tricky road this may be. We will just have to try our best, like our parents did for us.
We talked about our longstanding dream too, and decided it's time to make our trip to Europe a reality. We saved for a trip we are going to take later this winter, and realized that if we are careful, saving for travel doesn't have to be crazy hard (as long as nothing too extreme happens in the meantime). It might not be an immediate trip, but just knowing we are in the process of making it happen is a happy thought.
Fourteen years is a long time to be married. We've had plenty of growing pains, and lots of wonderful times too. We've been through a scary pregnancy and birth where Derrick almost lost both Derrin and me. We've parented babies, toddlers, little kids, big kids and now teenagers together, with all of the struggles and joys that entails. We've been through cancer in our family and the loss of a parent together. We've battled depression and health issues together. We've had the opportunity to travel to far away places we'd never been before together. We've build a house and home together. We've decorated the inside of our marriage with love.
This last weekend Derrick and I went out of town for our anniversary, as we try to do every year. The last four years we have went to Whitefish for our anniversary, so this year we decided to shake it up and go to Spokane instead.
The one commonality of our anniversaries throughout the years have been the monochromatic way the December sky decides to present itself. As we headed out of town on Friday, it looked as though we were heading into the usual grey but happy weekend, but somewhere around the middle of Saturday, the clouds opened up and gave us blue skies. They stuck around for the rest of our time out of town, and even now it is blue skies and sunny.
This was one of my personal favorite anniversary trips. Our motel was really close to downtown Spokane, so we pretty much walked to most of the places we wanted to go throughout the weekend. There was the usual shopping that goes along with a trip to Spokane, but we spent a lot of time walking, hanging out in our room (which was very nice), and going to some of the fun restaurants and pubs in downtown Spokane.
I love anniversary weekends. We always make the effort to have that weekend to ourselves, and without fail we have the best discussions together of our year.
We talked about getting older, and our fears we have attached to it. My fear (as I'm sure it is for a lot of people), is that of being devalued as a person by society. Derrick's is mostly just the fear of being sickly or not being able to do what he once did. Other than that, he's looking forward to being a cranky old man with no pressure from society to follow rules. He's preparing for a reign of obnoxiousness :) Getting old wouldn't be so bad as long as I could do it with him, because I know he will always see me as I really am. Hopefully, though, we will never have to get old.
Of course (!) we talked about the kids. Like most parents, we talk about them a lot. You know how when you love someone, all conversations have a way of leading to that person? That principle must apply to parents with their children. Our hopes and dreams for them equal and surpass the hopes and dreams for ourselves. The sum of our kid conversations are mostly how to keep them safe and sound but also give the tools and freedom to create happiness and dreams for themselves. As they get older, we are seeing what a tricky road this may be. We will just have to try our best, like our parents did for us.
We talked about our longstanding dream too, and decided it's time to make our trip to Europe a reality. We saved for a trip we are going to take later this winter, and realized that if we are careful, saving for travel doesn't have to be crazy hard (as long as nothing too extreme happens in the meantime). It might not be an immediate trip, but just knowing we are in the process of making it happen is a happy thought.
Fourteen years is a long time to be married. We've had plenty of growing pains, and lots of wonderful times too. We've been through a scary pregnancy and birth where Derrick almost lost both Derrin and me. We've parented babies, toddlers, little kids, big kids and now teenagers together, with all of the struggles and joys that entails. We've been through cancer in our family and the loss of a parent together. We've battled depression and health issues together. We've had the opportunity to travel to far away places we'd never been before together. We've build a house and home together. We've decorated the inside of our marriage with love.
