The Weekend

This last Friday was the Hospist Ball. I went ahead and took the pictures there, made some money for hospist ($10 charge per picture). It also turned out to be a pretty enlightening experience for me. I've always experience photography in terms of fun. This was more like frantic snapping for four and a half hours in a row. Turns out it felt like work. But it was good for me because I had to figure out how to do some things out of my comfort zone, like arranging rowdy people into group shots without using my voice, because we were so close to the band that I couldn't hardly be heard over it. And I had to learn to not expect perfection out of my pictures either. There was no time between shooting them and printing them to pull them up in my program and doctor them, which was super aggravating at first, but by the end of the night I could have cared less. Also, because of the timescale and the decorating committee, I did not get to do much with the background, which was extremely frustrating, because it could have been better if I would've had a little more time to work on it. But, once again, by the end of the night, I just did not care. So, I would say what I gained mostly out of the experience was more on terms of managing people, trying to make them smile, be comfortable, and getting them through the line and on to their picture. Thank goodness for Derrick who was taking care of the organizing of the portraits and the printing.

Our guest table at the ball was full, but we didn't get to see them very much. They all said they had fun though. Next year I will not do pictures. Even though it was a good experience, I would rather be part of the party.

Saturday Shannon and I went down to Plains where we met my sister and my kids (Steph and Renae watched them for me) at Mom's place. We just had an easy visiting day. It was nice. Mom is looking good. She is lifting her little arm weights and doing her step exercises to build up strength. She still is pretty weak, but she is doing well and trying super hard.

We came home Saturday night. Sunday was an easy going day. We had a lot of company, and watched movies. All in all it was a pretty good weekend.

Back in the Hospital

Mom got really sick last night. She was ambulanced to the Plains hospital where they got her pain under control. She spent the night there, and at two this afternoon she was ambulanced to Missoula. She has a pulmonary embolism (blood clot) in her right lung. Right now they are using a Heparin drip to disolve it. She will probably be in the hospital for at least a couple days while they try to get rid of it.

Exercise, Mom, and a Ball

This week consisted of: I went to the gym every day except for Thursday! Yeah for me! I did aero-step and pilate classes both a couple times. Aero-step is where they torture you with weights while you are stepping up and down in crazy patterns on your little stool. I suspect this will improve my coordination. It definately couldn't hurt any! It is a little painful to see exactly how clumsy one is by trying to follow a perky instructor who is bouncing up and down on her stool WHILE being I am surrounded on all sides by mirrors! I rue the moment she directs the class to face my direction, putting me in the front so they can see me falling all over myself in an attempt to get fit. It is actually pretty effective however. My body has been in a constant state of aching the entire week.

Also this week on Wednesday my Mom went to her first chemo since she got sick last time. She actually looked like herself again, even down to the little sparkle in her eye. She is a little thin, and she is still working on getting her strength back, but she felt good enough to tease my dad and Danny a little bit. It felt good to see a that little bit of oneriness again. Her doc took her all the way off of one of the chemos. He kept her on the 5FU, but he cut it back to about 3/4 as much as she was getting last time. Hopefully this will keep her from getting as sick. We ended her time in Missoula at Famous Footwear where I helped her pick out a couple pairs of shoes. She was supposed to just sit there while I brought shoes TO her, but she was up looking around quite abit herself. She has a great love of shoes. They lift her up in so many ways.

Thursday I went to school with Derrin to help out in the Kindergarden class. It is always so much fun there. All his little classmates are nice little kids. His teacher says that his class loves eachother almost TOO much. She can't hardly get them to quit talking. She is great at finding assignments for the parents so you actually feel like you are doing something worthwhile for the kids while there. She had me take each kid out, one by one, and go over their numbers and shapes. I quite enjoyed myself. Teaching kindergarden seems like it could be a great job.

Today I met with the lady who is organizing the annual Hospice Ball. We go to it every year because Derrick and Dave donate all of the electrical setup and maintenance for the event. This year, I am going to be doing the portraits there. Today we picked out several materials to use in the portrait backdrop. She said it includes a convertable and Marilyn Monroe to fit the theme "Dancing with the Stars". I must admit, I am a little apprehensive about taking this on. I don't feel quite qualified. At the same time, it will be a really good opportunity for me because it could be a stepping stone into being a photographer at other events. So, this weekend and next week I'm gonna be practicing portraits in artificial light situations... we'll see how it goes!

Mom

I just wanted to do a quick fill in on what's going on with my momma. She got out of the hospital about 12 days ago and I saw her this last Wednesday. She was supposed to get another chemo treatment, but she asked for a week off. She is still completely weak and has to recover a bit. Her doctor wasn't overly pleased with her choice. I have mixed emotions about him. On one hand, I love him solely because he is trying to make my mom well again. On the other hand, I think he is a grumpy guy who gets snippy if you don't jump when he says to. I guess working with such a terrible disease day in and out could make one crabby...

Anyways, she isn't feeling too hot. Hopefully next Wednesday she will feel more up to her treatment. I think it will have to happen either way so no more ground is lost with the obliterating of those hateful cancer cells.

The Beginning was Sad and a Little Crazy, But There Was a Happy Ending... I Love Happy Endings

For some reason I haven't been very motivated on myspace this week. It is a very strange turn around for me, because I was completely addicted for months on end! This place should come with a caution sign.

I've been meaning to write a blog this week. I actually did write a small one a couple days ago, but my computer freaked out and didn't post it. My frustration was great so I moved on to something else. But it is time to write down the highlights of the week so I don't forget them (my mind has way too many holes in to sustain memories right now).

I wanted to mention that when I went down to settle the proof of insurance thing, it was very anti-climatical. A clerk just looked at my insurance and stamped it dismissed. I have to admit, I was somewhat disappointed. The fact that I was disappointed made me stop and think a little about what is going on in my head. Then it came to me: We are in the middle of winter. It is grey skies all around. My mom is sick. And I always, 100% of the time, crash this time of year anyway. I fall apart, my memories of happy days get fuzzy, everything gets irritating and boring, I'm completely tired and my body feels like it is made out of lead. But instead of being prepared for this, it always comes as a bit of a shock when I realize if I have to live in this state of mind for even one more second I may have to kill myself .

It was do or die time. So, I went into town to various stores that sell the usual vitamins and supplements I always have to take this time of year, and I called Derrick to tell him it was time to join the gym (I pretty much do this every winter), so he called a gym he's been interested in and got it lined out for me. I really like it there and one of the best things is that they have a daycare, so I can go whenever I want. It's only been about four days since I started working toward a better frame of mind, but I am feeling a LOT more positive about life. I may just make it through this winter after all.

On a different note, I got to go see the Clumsy Lovers last night at the Top Hat! I LOVE them. Oh my goodness, you can't go to see their show and not be jumping around, smiling like a crazy person by the end of the night. We pushed our way to the very front of the crowd, my favorite place to be. I am still a little deaf from being right in front of the speaker, and my voice is still hoarse from yelling and singing along as loud as I could.

The people around us were so funny, I kept cracking up at them. There was this cowboy guy directly in front of us doing this crazy dance that had a lot of butt shaking involved. My friend Sabrina and I about died laughing. Then there were the usual Missoula hippie-types, twirling and whirling, feeling their magical fairy feelings. I love those hippies. They really make me feel like I could be doing cartwheels down the middle of the audience and no one would care at all. There were also your typical deviants all around us. There was this one guy that harrassed my friend Shawna Lee for a long time. I wouldn't really want to make her too mad. I was expecting a fist fight to break out. There was this one time where Shawna pulled me from her one side to the other, giving me a strange look. I kept happily bouncing up and down singing, but later she told me there was some freak smelling my hair and being... strange. There is something so demoralizing about a freak smelling your hair. But all in all, it was a fabulous night.

And that is the end of my rundown of the week. Cheers!

Proof of Insurance

Last year, the tags on the purple bomb expired, and I did nothing to accomidate the issue. Month after month, we drove around with expired tags. I felt a guilty twinge almost daily, but never enough to actually drive myself to the court house and buy new tags. Honestly, it was pure laziness on my part. I had the money set aside to do it, but the drive clear across town to go stand in a line for an undisclosed amount of time was the real mental roadblock. So, we committed to driving extra carefully, and let the months roll by. Eventually we realized that if we could make it to the first of January before buying the tags, that we wouldn't have to pay the previous year's taxes. Now, that is just economical.

The second of January, Kloe and I went down to the courthouse and paid for the new tags. I proudly put the new sticker on the front of my car. We'd been meaning to eventually put it on the back where it was supposed to go, but as you see, the tags have never had an appropriate amount of importance attatched to them for us to remody THAT situation either. We drove on our merry way, guilty twinges gone.

Enter yesterday, at the intersection of Reserve and Brooks where the train tracks run through. Since I have lived here I have only had to stop for a train there maybe four times. Yesterday I had to stop for a train. A police car pulled in right behind me. Now, because I was raised in Plains Montana, where I have been pulled over numerous occasions on a local officers whim (and the fact I have a #4 county plate on my car), I always expect to be randomly pulled over and this causes me to get twitchy. Sometimes I even start to quietly start to reassure myself,"You are OKAY, you have done nothing wrong, there is NO reason to be pulled over". When the train had gone by, and I started moving again, the blue and red lights behind me started to flash.

Did you know it is a fifty dollar fine to have the stickered tag on the front of the car? I didn't either. Also, did you know that your proof of insurance has to have the effective dates on it? Once again, me neither. I have to admit, it was somewhat satisfying to say, "I DO have a current tag, it is just on the front", and equally deflating to hear that it is still a fifty dollar penalty for not switching it to the back. But the officer was nice, and let me off the hook. He said it is the highway police officers that will really fine you for that (in town officers are the nice guys), but I still have to go to the courthouse with proof of insurance. Ironic huh? A whole year of procastinating the tag thing to avoid the courthouse, and now I have a week to reappear to another line there with proof of insurance. Poetic justice? Maybe.