~The Non-Routine Day~

This Wednesday Derrick took the day off of work, partially to finish getting well from a cold he's been fighting for a week, and partially to hang out with me since it feels like we haven't really just hung out for a long time. Our big plan was to have no plan at all, and for once that worked out quite well.

First we went to Sushi-Hana, one of Derrick's favorite restaurants, especially on their Thursday Dollar Day. I have only been there once, about three years ago. It was a pleasant suprise this time. I ate everything they brought except for the eel and the raw (but smoked) salmon.

After Sushi and a breif interlude at Rockin' Rudy's and Liquid Planet, we went to the treatment building to meet my parents and visit while Mom got her chemo. The doctor then decided to cancel it for a couple of weeks because she was on the verge of feeling sick again, and he didn't want a repeat of the last hospital stay from chemo overload. But her numbers keep going down,and today (Friday) she is looking alot better.

Since her treatment was cancelled, Mom and Dad headed back to Plains, and Derrick and I had more time on our hands. There were absolutely NO good movies showing, so we decided to go to the Missoula Art Museum, since we had never gone before. It was not quite what I expected. There was one exhibit that I sorta liked that was created by women from many different countries. The only rule they had to follow was that they had to use a box as their theme in one way or the other. Some of the artists were okay, because I at least had to stop and think "What the heck". One box I liked especially had a glamorous lady on the outside, and a whithered shell of a woman on the inside, portraying how us ladies like to look one way to the world while the drudging monotany of our everyday routines wear at who we really are. It is a depressing outlook for sure, but one I at least can look at and say...."Um, okay." Other boxes just irritated me. I hate it when artists try to shove their viewpoints down your throat with their "There is no box. I refuse to be part of representing the box that oppresses all womankid", WHILE they are still part of the exhibit. But still, I remembered their message, so I guess whoever the nut was that did that particular one is good at pushing a button, which from what I gathered while there, was what they wanted to do. By the way, NEVER touch the art. I briefly touched ONE of the exhibits, and I NEARLY gave the museum attendant an annurism! I hadn't had such a tongue lashing since I was in school. It was interestingly sort of fun... I'm so used to being the one who says "DON'T TOUCH, you see with your eyes, NOT your hands!". Anyways, I am thinking I may have to go back to the art museum and try to resist touching the exhibits again(and maybe bring the kids next time. )

A modest dinner at Jaker's ended our day our on the town. I, after all, had to help Derrin finish a project for school, and we needed to relieve Gramma from her day of watching kids. But it was a fun day and one worth blogging about.

Avacado Disappointment

That there are almost 300 calories in ONE LITTLE ITTY BITTY AVACADO?!? I did not realise this. When I was done working out on the elliptical machine today, it said I used 280 calories. Then I went home and ate a salad for lunch. With one avacado. SO disappointing!!!

Exercise+Avacado= Slight Irritation, but not enough to stop eatting the avacado during lunch while I read the avacado information (right after the ellipitical...) . Tomorrow.... only 1/2 avacado! After all, avacados are good for your heart... it compliments the exercise, just in a different way than I had planned.

On to other things... Sunday I turned 21... wait a minute, I believe that might be 31. I forgot all about it until my mom called to ask her yearly question,"Do you feel any older." Suprisingly, this year, the answer is "yes". But it is alright. I am happy. I am alive. I have people who love me and who I love back. Who could ask for more? At the same time, I am still relieved I do not celebrate birthdays!

And as for Monday, well you already know about the avacados. Only one scary fact like that PER Monday, so....

Tagged

Here are the rules: Once you have been tagged, you have to write a blog with 10 weird random things, facts, or habits about yourself. At the end, you choose 5 people to be tagged, list their names, and why you chose them. Don't forget to leave a comment that says 'you are tagged' on their profile and tell them to read your latest blog.

1. I am obsessive about brushing my teeth. I have NO cavities though:-)

2. I also am obsessive about my feet. I keep them all loofahed, lotioned and polished all year round, even during boot weather.

3. I hate green beans. Not too interesting, but very true.

4. I have a serious coffee addiction. Unfortunately, coffee also starts to make me have scary heart palpatations after consuming too much of it for several months in a row. Therefore, I have to go off of coffee a couple months out of every year. This seems to make it possible to consume coffee symptom-free for the rest of the time. I am in a time-out right now (going on a month):-( Herbal tea is a good substitute however.

5. My Dad is from a familyof 14 kids and my Mom from a family of 6. Between all of the offspring from those families, I have hundreds of cousins.

6. I was the only girl in my class until 6th grade. The school I went to was in Paradise.

7. I have an interest in the numbers 3, 11, and 13. I was born 3-11-76 (and 7+6=13), I graduated in 94 (9+4=13), my mailing address as a kid was Box 113, I have 13 letters between my first and last name, and all of the houses I've lived in in Missoula were numbered either 3 or their numbers add up to 13... I know, you can make anything equal something if you look hard enough.

8. I LOVE black licorish. It's even better than chocolate.

9. I do not like most dogs. They are slobbery and jump on me. But if you have a dog and you are my friend, I will make every effort to adore your dog.

10. I am genetically unable to roll my tongue, and I am not double-jointed. There you go!

Hmmm. As far as tagging anyone else, most of the people I would have already been tagged or have done their list soooo.... I will just say if you are feeling creative and have some weird facts to share, go ahead!

The Weekend

This last Friday was the Hospist Ball. I went ahead and took the pictures there, made some money for hospist ($10 charge per picture). It also turned out to be a pretty enlightening experience for me. I've always experience photography in terms of fun. This was more like frantic snapping for four and a half hours in a row. Turns out it felt like work. But it was good for me because I had to figure out how to do some things out of my comfort zone, like arranging rowdy people into group shots without using my voice, because we were so close to the band that I couldn't hardly be heard over it. And I had to learn to not expect perfection out of my pictures either. There was no time between shooting them and printing them to pull them up in my program and doctor them, which was super aggravating at first, but by the end of the night I could have cared less. Also, because of the timescale and the decorating committee, I did not get to do much with the background, which was extremely frustrating, because it could have been better if I would've had a little more time to work on it. But, once again, by the end of the night, I just did not care. So, I would say what I gained mostly out of the experience was more on terms of managing people, trying to make them smile, be comfortable, and getting them through the line and on to their picture. Thank goodness for Derrick who was taking care of the organizing of the portraits and the printing.

Our guest table at the ball was full, but we didn't get to see them very much. They all said they had fun though. Next year I will not do pictures. Even though it was a good experience, I would rather be part of the party.

Saturday Shannon and I went down to Plains where we met my sister and my kids (Steph and Renae watched them for me) at Mom's place. We just had an easy visiting day. It was nice. Mom is looking good. She is lifting her little arm weights and doing her step exercises to build up strength. She still is pretty weak, but she is doing well and trying super hard.

We came home Saturday night. Sunday was an easy going day. We had a lot of company, and watched movies. All in all it was a pretty good weekend.

Back in the Hospital

Mom got really sick last night. She was ambulanced to the Plains hospital where they got her pain under control. She spent the night there, and at two this afternoon she was ambulanced to Missoula. She has a pulmonary embolism (blood clot) in her right lung. Right now they are using a Heparin drip to disolve it. She will probably be in the hospital for at least a couple days while they try to get rid of it.

Exercise, Mom, and a Ball

This week consisted of: I went to the gym every day except for Thursday! Yeah for me! I did aero-step and pilate classes both a couple times. Aero-step is where they torture you with weights while you are stepping up and down in crazy patterns on your little stool. I suspect this will improve my coordination. It definately couldn't hurt any! It is a little painful to see exactly how clumsy one is by trying to follow a perky instructor who is bouncing up and down on her stool WHILE being I am surrounded on all sides by mirrors! I rue the moment she directs the class to face my direction, putting me in the front so they can see me falling all over myself in an attempt to get fit. It is actually pretty effective however. My body has been in a constant state of aching the entire week.

Also this week on Wednesday my Mom went to her first chemo since she got sick last time. She actually looked like herself again, even down to the little sparkle in her eye. She is a little thin, and she is still working on getting her strength back, but she felt good enough to tease my dad and Danny a little bit. It felt good to see a that little bit of oneriness again. Her doc took her all the way off of one of the chemos. He kept her on the 5FU, but he cut it back to about 3/4 as much as she was getting last time. Hopefully this will keep her from getting as sick. We ended her time in Missoula at Famous Footwear where I helped her pick out a couple pairs of shoes. She was supposed to just sit there while I brought shoes TO her, but she was up looking around quite abit herself. She has a great love of shoes. They lift her up in so many ways.

Thursday I went to school with Derrin to help out in the Kindergarden class. It is always so much fun there. All his little classmates are nice little kids. His teacher says that his class loves eachother almost TOO much. She can't hardly get them to quit talking. She is great at finding assignments for the parents so you actually feel like you are doing something worthwhile for the kids while there. She had me take each kid out, one by one, and go over their numbers and shapes. I quite enjoyed myself. Teaching kindergarden seems like it could be a great job.

Today I met with the lady who is organizing the annual Hospice Ball. We go to it every year because Derrick and Dave donate all of the electrical setup and maintenance for the event. This year, I am going to be doing the portraits there. Today we picked out several materials to use in the portrait backdrop. She said it includes a convertable and Marilyn Monroe to fit the theme "Dancing with the Stars". I must admit, I am a little apprehensive about taking this on. I don't feel quite qualified. At the same time, it will be a really good opportunity for me because it could be a stepping stone into being a photographer at other events. So, this weekend and next week I'm gonna be practicing portraits in artificial light situations... we'll see how it goes!

Mom

I just wanted to do a quick fill in on what's going on with my momma. She got out of the hospital about 12 days ago and I saw her this last Wednesday. She was supposed to get another chemo treatment, but she asked for a week off. She is still completely weak and has to recover a bit. Her doctor wasn't overly pleased with her choice. I have mixed emotions about him. On one hand, I love him solely because he is trying to make my mom well again. On the other hand, I think he is a grumpy guy who gets snippy if you don't jump when he says to. I guess working with such a terrible disease day in and out could make one crabby...

Anyways, she isn't feeling too hot. Hopefully next Wednesday she will feel more up to her treatment. I think it will have to happen either way so no more ground is lost with the obliterating of those hateful cancer cells.

The Beginning was Sad and a Little Crazy, But There Was a Happy Ending... I Love Happy Endings

For some reason I haven't been very motivated on myspace this week. It is a very strange turn around for me, because I was completely addicted for months on end! This place should come with a caution sign.

I've been meaning to write a blog this week. I actually did write a small one a couple days ago, but my computer freaked out and didn't post it. My frustration was great so I moved on to something else. But it is time to write down the highlights of the week so I don't forget them (my mind has way too many holes in to sustain memories right now).

I wanted to mention that when I went down to settle the proof of insurance thing, it was very anti-climatical. A clerk just looked at my insurance and stamped it dismissed. I have to admit, I was somewhat disappointed. The fact that I was disappointed made me stop and think a little about what is going on in my head. Then it came to me: We are in the middle of winter. It is grey skies all around. My mom is sick. And I always, 100% of the time, crash this time of year anyway. I fall apart, my memories of happy days get fuzzy, everything gets irritating and boring, I'm completely tired and my body feels like it is made out of lead. But instead of being prepared for this, it always comes as a bit of a shock when I realize if I have to live in this state of mind for even one more second I may have to kill myself .

It was do or die time. So, I went into town to various stores that sell the usual vitamins and supplements I always have to take this time of year, and I called Derrick to tell him it was time to join the gym (I pretty much do this every winter), so he called a gym he's been interested in and got it lined out for me. I really like it there and one of the best things is that they have a daycare, so I can go whenever I want. It's only been about four days since I started working toward a better frame of mind, but I am feeling a LOT more positive about life. I may just make it through this winter after all.

On a different note, I got to go see the Clumsy Lovers last night at the Top Hat! I LOVE them. Oh my goodness, you can't go to see their show and not be jumping around, smiling like a crazy person by the end of the night. We pushed our way to the very front of the crowd, my favorite place to be. I am still a little deaf from being right in front of the speaker, and my voice is still hoarse from yelling and singing along as loud as I could.

The people around us were so funny, I kept cracking up at them. There was this cowboy guy directly in front of us doing this crazy dance that had a lot of butt shaking involved. My friend Sabrina and I about died laughing. Then there were the usual Missoula hippie-types, twirling and whirling, feeling their magical fairy feelings. I love those hippies. They really make me feel like I could be doing cartwheels down the middle of the audience and no one would care at all. There were also your typical deviants all around us. There was this one guy that harrassed my friend Shawna Lee for a long time. I wouldn't really want to make her too mad. I was expecting a fist fight to break out. There was this one time where Shawna pulled me from her one side to the other, giving me a strange look. I kept happily bouncing up and down singing, but later she told me there was some freak smelling my hair and being... strange. There is something so demoralizing about a freak smelling your hair. But all in all, it was a fabulous night.

And that is the end of my rundown of the week. Cheers!