I know that life can change in an instant. I know this because it has happened to me, several times. The knowledge of this does not mean preparation for it. The bad phone call I expect at 2 o'clock in the morning instead takes the form of a nurse with bad news at noon on Thursday. This will go down as one of the saddest and scariest days in my life.
We took my mom in for a colonoscopy Thursday morning because she was having pain and we were trying to find the cause. A nurse suggested a colonoscopy because of the area of her pain and because she has never had one before. To our horror, they found a blockage that had to be removed immediately. The set her up for surgery on Friday and put her in a hospital room. The doctor had his suspicions for cancer. My mom did not think this could be the case. Really, I could not believe this would be what they found either.
They took out a tumor the size of a tennis ball Friday. They found a spot on her liver the size of a golf ball. They found a suspect lymphnode. They sent it all off to pathology but won't have the results until Monday. But the surgeon says it looks like he would expect cancer to look like.
I am numb. I cried all my tears out and there is nothing left. I have to be strong for my mom. All is not lost. We will fight this with all of the strength we have. Because of the person she is, because of the love she has grown in her friends and family, she has a huge support system. We will all fight this side by side with every strength of our beings.
She is healing from her surgery right now. I am in the hospital room with her, have been staying here with her since Thursday. Derrick brought the computer in so I could do some research but honestly I can't read about it yet. I was trying to look up what she has, mortality rates, treatment and I realized I kept blanking out. It is like my brain can't absorb any of it yet. I need a little more time to process. I need to stay focused on the moment. Hold her hand, brush her hair back from her face, be with her through the pain. She is asleep right now, thank goodness. She needs to rest. Fortunately, she has had many visitors today. I can tell it makes her feel better with everyone here. But she also needs some sleep.
She is supposed to stay here a week. We called Renae is Jamaica (actually Steph talked to Doug) but they still don't know the whole situation. Even if they would have tried to get flights straight home I doubt it would have got them here much sooner. I know this is going to be really hard for Renae. I will be so glad to see her though. She has always been a tower of strength for me and I need her here so very bad. They should be here tomorrow sometime.
For now, everything is okay. Her pain is under control. If anything else comes up, I will try to keep you all posted (if I can).
We took my mom in for a colonoscopy Thursday morning because she was having pain and we were trying to find the cause. A nurse suggested a colonoscopy because of the area of her pain and because she has never had one before. To our horror, they found a blockage that had to be removed immediately. The set her up for surgery on Friday and put her in a hospital room. The doctor had his suspicions for cancer. My mom did not think this could be the case. Really, I could not believe this would be what they found either.
They took out a tumor the size of a tennis ball Friday. They found a spot on her liver the size of a golf ball. They found a suspect lymphnode. They sent it all off to pathology but won't have the results until Monday. But the surgeon says it looks like he would expect cancer to look like.
I am numb. I cried all my tears out and there is nothing left. I have to be strong for my mom. All is not lost. We will fight this with all of the strength we have. Because of the person she is, because of the love she has grown in her friends and family, she has a huge support system. We will all fight this side by side with every strength of our beings.
She is healing from her surgery right now. I am in the hospital room with her, have been staying here with her since Thursday. Derrick brought the computer in so I could do some research but honestly I can't read about it yet. I was trying to look up what she has, mortality rates, treatment and I realized I kept blanking out. It is like my brain can't absorb any of it yet. I need a little more time to process. I need to stay focused on the moment. Hold her hand, brush her hair back from her face, be with her through the pain. She is asleep right now, thank goodness. She needs to rest. Fortunately, she has had many visitors today. I can tell it makes her feel better with everyone here. But she also needs some sleep.
She is supposed to stay here a week. We called Renae is Jamaica (actually Steph talked to Doug) but they still don't know the whole situation. Even if they would have tried to get flights straight home I doubt it would have got them here much sooner. I know this is going to be really hard for Renae. I will be so glad to see her though. She has always been a tower of strength for me and I need her here so very bad. They should be here tomorrow sometime.
For now, everything is okay. Her pain is under control. If anything else comes up, I will try to keep you all posted (if I can).
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